Friday, September 26, 2025

now

 

 

How Parent-child relationship is damaged ?

It is said that a child's disrespect toward their father does not mean a parent is no longer important or respectable; rather, it can signify a breakdown in the parent-child relationship, potentially leading to a loss of trust and hurt feelings. Disrespectful behavior can stem from various factors, including a lack of connection, a need for attention, or observing disrespectful behavior in peers.Disrespectful behavior of the son is also due to the surroundings or friend circle around him.

While the child's actions are their responsibility, it can be a sign that a parent needs to address the situation by modelling respectful behavior, maintaining consistency, and potentially seeking professional support for their child.If parents are more dependent financially that other sources, then thinking of the son’s behavior undergoes change in view of that he is paying out of his earnings.

Open communication, competent family counseling, acknowledging previous hurts, and constant compassion and forgiveness are all important ways to mend a broken parent-child connection.  Rebuilding trust and connection can also be facilitated by shared activities, setting up appropriate boundaries, and showing a sincere commitment to the relationship with tiny gestures like affirmations and apologies.Since healing is a process that takes work from both parties, think about how you might contribute to the situation's dynamics and particular requirements.

Only if they both freely own their own shortcomings, beg for forgiveness, and receive it. One cannot harbor hatred or place the blame on the other. It cannot be obtained by holding the other person accountable for decisions you made that resulted in an unsatisfactory response. Recognize that, despite our love for others, we are all sinners and hurt them. Have faith that the offense they committed was not necessarily a deliberate act of malice. Then begin there. There will still be disagreements between you. Be prepared to ignore them.

One of my office collegue told her story that her oldest child did do this. They have not spoken to him or his wife in four years. They returned the Christmas gifts she sent to her grandson. They have blocked any and all access to them. It distressing, especially considering how close she is to her daughter's son. She respects their wishes and look after them life long. How do she could cope with it?  Well, that first year there was a lot of tears and anger on her part. She was shocked and about lost it when she got her Ramzan Eid gifts back, and she started shedding tears the whole night.She cried and screamed for about a day. Then she pulled up her big girl panties and took those unwelcome gifts down to a local day care center.  Her grandchild didn't get to play with them and she didn't get to see his smile and have fun. she got to see some kids smile and play and have fun with them. As for talking bad about her son and his wife? Nope she will not do it, nor will she allow anyone else to talk trash about them in her presence.  Whatever their reasons they feel this is best.  She further added that whenever she look at the children of her neighbour, she feels that all parents should havae such children, respecting their parent. 

First, determine whether the problem is the absence of contact. The parents must examine themselves critically and consider the reasons behind this incident. Most likely, there were numerous warning indicators. The decision to stop communication is not made lightly; it is a long and difficult one, and the child has to make this choice in order to safeguard their physical and emotional health. Unless there is a very significant problem, people do not want to cut off their parents or family. Are they very needy and clinging? Are they interfering and controlling? Do they have unreasonable expectations? Does the youngster continue to be undermined by a narcissist? A child may choose to avoid interaction for any of those reasons. In that scenario, the parents

They must learn to appreciate and learn to apologize for their previous actions. It's a another matter entirely if the child is narcissistic; in such cases, they could be cruel and cut off communication with their parents. They want to plead with the parents to allow them to return to their life. The parents need to adjust since the narcissist won't. Let the child go and carry on with your life without pleading for them to return. Narcissists just bring forth drama, mayhem, and suffering; nobody is valuable to them, not even family members, because they are abusive. It might not be a relationship problem if the child has relocated far for job; rather, it could be an opportunity the youngster did not want to.

There are times when quality time is more valuable than quantity. Other means of communication include phone, email, Zoom, and so on. Tell the youngster that you are there for them and that you love and support them. Don't put them under pressure to call or visit more often. Accept the current state of the connection. Respect your child's needs and the limits they have set. Respect the fact that the child's requirements have changed as an adult. Then, even if your connection isn't what you desire, you should value and cultivate it. Relationships based on distance can endure.

The parents need to take a close look at themselves and think about what caused this situation. There were probably a lot of warning signs. The youngster must make the difficult and drawn-out decision to cease communicating in order to protect their mental and physical well-being. People don't want to cut off their parents or family unless there is a serious issue. Are they clinging and needy? Are they controlling and meddling? Are they expecting too much? Does the child's narcissistic behavior continue to undermine them? For any of those reasons, a youngster may decide to shun social interaction. In that case, the parents. 

They need to learn to accept responsibility for their past behavior and to express regret for it. If the child is narcissistic, it's a different story; in these situations, they may be cruel and stop talking to their parents. They wish to beg their parents to let them go back to their lives. The narcissist won't change, so the parents must. Don't beg the youngster to come back; instead, let them go and continue about your life. Because they are abusive, narcissists only create chaos, drama, and pain; no one, not even family members, is important to them. If the child has moved far for work, it may not be a relationship issue; rather, it may be an opportunity the child did not want to. 

Sometimes, quality time is more important than quantity. Additional channels of communication include Zoom, email, and the phone. Remind the child that you love and support them and that you are there for them. Avoid pressuring them to call or come in more frequently. Acknowledge the connection as it is. Be mindful of your child's needs and boundaries. Recognize that as an adult, the child's needs have evolved. Then, you should cherish and nurture your relationship, even if it isn't what you want. Distance-based relationships can last.

 


Friday, September 5, 2025

Whenever people succeed in life, petty people will try to pull them down

 

Whenever people succeed in life, petty people will try to pull them down.

Your success will always be painful for your enemies from people you've never offended. But they will compare your success with theirs and try to measure how successful they are. Even though they don't desire what you have, many others will be envious of you. Simply put, they don't want you to possess it. Because you have the results of labor they are unwilling to perform themselves, others will despise you.They will blame everything but your deliberate efforts for your accomplishment. Remember that you made the decision to move forward with your life for a reason, even if it feels lonely and you're feeling demoralized by everything. You would not be accepted there even if you returned. Moments of hardship and persecution from people you leave behind may accompany growth, but they are insignificant in comparison to the satisfaction that comes from watching yourself change into a better, happier person all around.

Just because they're jealous. Since they are unhappy, it causes them to feel insecure about themselves. A poisonous buddy of mine who possessed the same trait finally began to abuse me every day, denigrate me, and use the most cruel language you can think of. Why I continued to put up with her is beyond me. They are simply projecting their personal insecurities and resentment. For this reason, you should always be surrounded by positive people and ideas. Keep your distance from these contagious individuals who don't care about improving the lives of others, and don't belittle yourself. When you are happy as a person, it becomes a threat, and many others find that intolerable.

It relies on a number of variables, such as if the person dragging the other person is a narcissist. Is the successful individual using unfair or dishonest methods to achieve their success? Does the unsuccessful individual want the person who succeeds more than them to stay with them? Some people feel envious of others because they are successful or easy-going while they are not doing their share of the work. Perhaps the wealthy individual denigrates those who are not as successful financially as they are. My basic argument is that many people despise others for their poor character, shallow treatment of others, and for giving others a lot of useless rewards (so to say, being fed from a silver platter) without having to.

Additionally, there are those who are selfish and unappreciated because they are bad or not the best people (those who made their bed bad fare in square and should lie in it), as well as those who want to be included in the boat they are in. Many of them want to pull others down to where they are (pull others into their metaphorical boat) so that they can either enjoy the pain or suffering of others or avoid feeling like they are the odd one out in their situation or being. Some of them only feel valuable as individuals when they are in positions of authority or have greater prestige or recognition than others.

Some people use confirmation bias to paint the majority of those who are rich or extremely fortunate or more financially successful than they are as shallow, pretentious, selfish, snobbish, or overly demanding. This is because the high society culture surrounding money frequently produces people who are like that. In these cases, class is the dominant factor, encompassing both the upper-middle class and lower-middle class, as well as (sometimes) destitution.  Some people miss the person they used to know or miss, and they may ascribe this factually or falsely. Others just miss a relationship and person they had, or had more of with closeness and attention from or emotional and social opportunity/support with.


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 Article Title: Rising Above: Why Success Attracts Pettiness and How to Stay Unshaken

 

Meta Description: Feeling targeted after a win? Discover why petty people try to pull successful people down and learn 5 powerful strategies to protect your peace and keep moving forward.

 

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Have you ever finally achieved a goal, only to be met with backhanded compliments, whispered gossip, or outright sabotage? You land the promotion, start a successful business, or even just share a piece of good news, and suddenly, the negativity seems to pour in from unexpected places.

 

You are not alone, and you are not imagining it. The old adage is true: “The tallest tree catches the most wind.”

 

When you begin to succeed in life, petty people will often try to pull you down. This isn't a reflection of your failure, but rather a painful sign of your success. Understanding the "why" behind this behavior is the first step to learning how to rise above it.

 

 Why Do People Try to Pull Successful People Down?

 

Petty behavior rarely originates from a place of strength. Instead, it’s almost always born from insecurity and fear.

 

1.  Insecurity and Low Self-Esteem: Your success holds up a mirror to their own lack of progress or unfulfilled dreams. Instead of being inspired, they feel threatened. Tearing you down becomes a misguided way to level the playing field in their own minds.

2.  The Crab Mentality: This powerful metaphor comes from crabs in a bucket. If one crab tries to climb out, the others will pull it back down to ensure no one escapes. Similarly, some people, often from within the same social or professional circles, cannot stand to see someone else escape a situation they themselves feel stuck in.

3.  A Feeling of Entitlement: They believe they deserve the success you have worked for, and your achievement feels like a personal injustice. Their pettiness is an expression of their bruised ego.

4.  Sheer Boredom and Negativity: For some, gossip and criticism are a form of entertainment. They have no grand ambition of their own, so they fill their time by focusing on, and picking apart, the ambitions of others.

 

Recognizing that this behavior is about them and not you is crucial. It allows you to depersonalize the attacks and respond from a place of power, not emotion.

 

 How to Respond: 5 Strategies to Protect Your Success and Your Peace

 

You cannot control the actions of others, but you can absolutely control your reaction. Here’s how to handle the petty people without getting dragged into their drama.

 

 1. Don’t Engage—Silence is Your Superpower

Petty people thrive on reaction. They want to see you get defensive, angry, or upset. It validates their efforts and gives them the attention they crave. By refusing to engage, you rob them of their power. Silence is not weakness; it is a dignified and powerful response that says, "Your opinion does not affect my reality."

 

 2. Double Down on Your Own Journey

The best revenge is massive success. Instead of wasting energy on these distractions, pour every ounce of it back into your goals. Let your continued growth and achievement be the undeniable proof that their pettiness is irrelevant. Keep your eyes on the horizon, not on the mud at your feet.

 

 3. Curate Your Inner Circle

Success can be a filter for your relationships. It reveals who your true supporters are. Invest your time and emotional energy in people who celebrate your wins, offer constructive criticism, and want to see you soar. Distance yourself from the energy vampires who only drain you.

 

 4. Practice Empathetic Detachment

This means understanding why someone might be acting petty (see the reasons above) without feeling the need to fix them or absorb their negativity. You can think, “Ah, they must be really struggling right now to act that way,” and then consciously choose to let that thought go without letting it affect your mood.

 

 5. Use It as Fuel

Transform their negativity into your motivation. Let every critical comment, every jealous jab, be a reminder that you are moving in the right direction. You are making an impact, and you are leaving them behind. Channel that energy into your next big project.

 

 Final Thought: Your Success is Your Truth

 

Petty people are a footnote in your story of success, not the main narrative. Do not grant them a starring role.

 

The wind will always try to blow out a small fire, but it only fuels a wildfire. Be the wildfire.

 

Keep shining. Keep achieving. And never, ever allow the pettiness of others to make you dim your light.

 

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What are your thoughts? Have you experienced this? Share your strategies for rising above negativity in the comments below. Let’s build a community of support and success!

 


Tuesday, September 2, 2025

Life is not a dress rehearsal. But take life seriously and spend time doing something you love

 
Life is not a dress rehearsal. But take life seriously and spend time doing something you love. 

Life is not just party and pleasure. There is suffering and hopelessness in life in addition to celebration and joy. Unimaginable things occur. Everything can be completely upended at times. Good people have bad things happen to them. Certain problems, like birth abnormalities and physical disabilities, are out of our control. We are unable to change either our birth circumstances or our parents. I apologize if the ball bounced that way. Nevertheless, what should we do next—cry or run? That is a decision we must make.

Even if we can't always control our surroundings, we can control our attitude.  One can choose to pretend to be a victim or a victor. Our future is determined by our temperament rather than our position.

To make a rainbow, you need both sunshine and rain. Our lives are the same. Both joy and sadness are present. There are dark and brilliant patches, good and bad. Overcoming adversity only makes us stronger. Although we have no control over every occurrence in our lives, we do have influence over how we respond to it.  Promoting Indian tea was Richard Blechnyden's goal. 

What distinguishes positive believing from positive thinking?   What if you could hear what you're thinking? Are they favorable or unfavorable? What mental programs are you putting in place to succeed or fail? Your performance is significantly impacted by the way you think.  Every morning, we make the decision to be motivated and to have a positive outlook.  It's difficult to live a positive life, but it's as difficult to live a bad one. If given the option, I would choose to live a positive life.

Would you take the life seriously if you knew it was all fiction? Because life is made up of the experiences that each of us has. Indeed, there are real things in the world—people, things, events, and situations—but we can only experience them in our minds. In other words, nothing in the world is inherently emotional. losing the lottery. avoiding termination from employment. not engaging in sexual activity. avoiding cancer. Whatever you feel or experience, it's only the product of your thoughts' fluctuations and the subconscious meaning you've assigned to things. Because of this, you may feel pleased with yourself or the funds in your bank account at one point. 

Regarding the topic on whether or not life should be taken seriously, have faith in your intuition at the time. Considering the current state of our thinking, we are all doing our best. There will come times when life may appear to be lighthearted and enjoyable. At some point, it will appear solemn and depressing. They are both fake. It's all about your experience at the time, and that's what I find so intriguing about life.


It's a happy life. One will develop and grow more if they are content and like life, which one always desires. Where is the serious term for, then? How one interprets the issues in life is entirely up to them. Happiness itself demonstrates one's fortitude, aptitude, and approach.  One should begin to take life seriously when one’s life is in danger and your survival is on the line. You should take your life seriously when society forces beliefs on you that you disagree with and you become enslaved by the pseudo-social dogmas that restrict your ability to think for yourself.  You should take your life seriously when insults and humiliations that you don't deserve damage your self-esteem and you come to the realization that you must be self-sufficient.  You should take your life seriously if you want to create a brighter future for yourself and your loved ones but lack the necessary finances.

 

 

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Have you ever had the thought, “I’ll do that when things settle down,” or “One day, I’ll finally start”? We treat our lives like a rough draft, a practice run for some future, more perfect version of ourselves. We save our best china for guests, our nice clothes for a special occasion, and our deepest passions for a retirement that is never guaranteed.
 
The stark, beautiful, and terrifying truth is this: Life is not a dress rehearsal. This is the main performance. The curtain is up, the lights are on, and you are on stage, right now.
 
But if this is the real thing, why do so many of us spend our days in a role we didn’t choose? We trade time—the one truly non-renewable resource we have—for paychecks that fund a life we’re too busy to live. The modern tragedy is not that we aim too high and fail, but that we aim too low and succeed at a life that doesn’t truly fulfill us.
 
This isn’t a call to quit your job, abandon your responsibilities, and move to a beach (unless that is your authentic, well-considered dream). It is, however, a urgent plea to stop postponing your joy and start integrating what you love into the fabric of your daily life.
 
 The "Someday" Illusion
 
  “Someday” is a seductive and dangerous mirage. We tell ourselves:
   "Someday, I’ll learn to play the piano."
   "Someday, I’ll write that book."
   "Someday, I’ll travel to see those ancient ruins."
   "Someday, I’ll have more time for my friends and family."
 
“Someday” is the dress rehearsal we keep waiting for. But the show is already happening. The days slip into weeks, weeks into years, and the “someday” we bank on may never arrive. The only time we ever truly have is the present moment.
 
 Doing What You Love Isn't Frivolous—It's Essential
 
Some might argue that prioritizing passion is a luxury or selfish. This is a fundamental misunderstanding. Spending time doing something you love is not about indulgence; it’s about sustenance.
 
It is the thing that:
   Refills your cup: It counteracts burnout and stress, giving you energy for your other responsibilities.
   Defines you beyond your job: You are not just your job title. You are a painter, a gardener, a hiker, a volunteer, a chef, a storyteller.
   Brings joy and meaning: These activities are the highlights of our lives, the memories we cherish, the stories we tell. They are the very point of the struggle.
 
 How to Start Living the Main Performance Today
 
You don’t need a radical overhaul to start honoring your passions. You just need to start weaving them into the now.
 
1.  Identify Your "Love": What makes you lose track of time? What did you love doing as a child? It doesn’t have to be grand. It can be baking, birdwatching, coding, dancing in your kitchen, or building model trains. Name it.
 
2.  Schedule It Like a Critical Meeting: If it’s not on your calendar, it gets pushed aside. Block out 30 minutes three times a week. Protect this time as if it were the most important meeting of your day—because it is. It’s a meeting with your authentic self.
 
3.  Start Small, Eliminate Barriers: Want to paint? Don’t buy a full studio setup. Get a small sketchpad and a pencil. Want to run? Don’t aim for a marathon next week. Just put on your shoes and walk around the block. Make the entry point so easy you can’t say no.
 
4.  Reframe Your Perspective: Instead of thinking, “I have to go to work, then do the dishes, then help with homework,” try: “I get to provide for my family, and I will also get to spend 20 minutes reading my book before bed.” Find the balance between duty and delight.
 
5.  Connect with Others: Share your passion. Join a local club, an online forum, or simply invite a friend to join you. Shared joy is amplified joy.
 
 The Final Bow
 
Imagine yourself at the end of your life, looking back. You won’t regret the meetings you missed or the emails you didn’t send. You will regret the hikes you didn’t take, the friendships you neglected, the instrument you didn’t learn, the love you didn’t express.
 
This is your life. Not a practice run. Not a rehearsal for a better one later.
 
The stage is yours. The spotlight is waiting. What will you do with your time today that actually matters to you? Don’t wait for the encore to start singing your song. Start now. Spend your precious time doing something you love.